25 Comments
User's avatar
Sogole Kane's avatar

GROWN UP ROMANCE!! As someone who’s been married for 8+ years- that hit.

Rosie Buchanan's avatar

And herein lies the secret to a loving and successful partnership.

Eileen O'Brien's avatar

THIS!! Such a well written assessment of what’s going on. Thank you.

Lola's avatar

EXACTLY, create a life that it worth living on your own – and if you feel like it, gift yourself on Valentine's!

Alexandra Berry's avatar

stunning newsletter x <3

Dina Keilany's avatar

You’re speaking my language! I’ve been partnered for ten years and this is exactly how we do it. 🙂

Tina Boetto's avatar

Your editor's note is spot on! You're a much better partner when you focus on exploring your own interests and keeping a healthy social life outside of your boyfriend/husband. Balance is important.

The Irish Wet Nurse's avatar

"Dump him," says the woman who spends a lot of her sub talking about having a fiancé, doing things with her fiancé, and marriage plans. Yeah, girls, dump him and spend more time reading Jess's substack and buying from her affiliate links.

Ashley La Fleur's avatar

In the wise words of Ta-Nehisi Coates: was silence not an option?

Jess Graves's avatar

There it is!!

Rosie Buchanan's avatar

Seems like you didn’t read the post?

The Irish Wet Nurse's avatar

Oh, I read it, while doing my nails. Exactly what I said, she crows on about HER boyfriend, and how she won't be dumping HIM, but that her readers should know that their beaus or crushes should not be the primary focus of their lives. Focus on themselves and spend some more money on their thousandth pair of loafers. Mammon rules supreme.

Julie Dwyer's avatar

Tell me you missed the point without telling me you missed the point.

Rosie Buchanan's avatar

Doubled down on point-missing!

Note to Self's avatar

Iconic self-own here

Romilly Newman's avatar

Obsessed with this title

Jess Graves's avatar

rage bait for the wrong side of substack

Noora Raj Brown's avatar

This title ⚰️

Jess Graves's avatar

I had to clickbait 'em

Noora Raj Brown's avatar

Worked like a charm on me

Jess Graves's avatar

I am sure you won't be the only one. I await the angry comments from the people who don't read the body copy hahaha

Julie Dwyer's avatar

They give themselves away, with an assist from a keyboard.

LESLIE T's avatar

I got married late to someone older and so many of my pals who married young dumped their husbands and are much happier for it. I think your generation has that part of things better than ours did; many of us had our whole identities wrapped up in their marriage/husbands. I don’t but definitely largely did for the first decade of our marriage.