What We Wear When We Go Home
Thanksgiving style for every version of “family” (charming, chaotic, or chosen).
This month’s Inbox Stylist is in partnership with Mulberry and Net-a-Porter. If you’d like to work with The Love List or Jess Graves, please email lauren@aire-ny.com.
There can be a high emotional temperature to Thanksgiving dressing in a year like 2025, so I’m shooting for a mix of comfort and self-presentation. The Instagram voyeurism of whatever “home” looks like for my friends is always fun to watch. For some, it’s a Norman Rockwell tableau with a dress code that hasn’t changed since the Clinton era; for others, it’s a potluck in a friend’s one-bedroom where the oven is working overtime and the wine gets opened before noon. Some of us travel back to childhood bedrooms, some of us host in apartments that reflect the life we built on our own terms. But the common thread is this: we want to look like ourselves, only… softer.
What you wear to Thanksgiving is almost never about fashion alone. It’s about signaling: that you’re doing well, that you’re over him, that you’re grown. It’s also about tact: dressing well enough that your aunt can’t say a word, but casual enough that you don’t look like you’re trying too hard. It’s a Mulberry bag swinging from your shoulder like bait. It’s absolutely nobody at your Aunt’s house knowing who Juju Vera is except you. (And at night, at that hometown bar, maybe a bare shoulder that makes your ex whisper, “She looks incredible.”) These are clothes for diplomacy and showing up with grace, even if Kevlar feels more appropriate for your family dynamic.
So this Inbox Stylist issue is doing what we do best: offering actual outfits for the reality of your Thanksgiving. Sweaters that travel well. Pants you can sit cross-legged in and love on the dog. Looks for blended families, chosen families, strained families, and the families we rebuild in adulthood. Here’s the inspiration you need to feel at ease, no matter who you’re sitting across from.
Happy Thanksgiving.
The No Place Like Home Thanksgiving: You’re dressing for the house that built you — and the people who will immediately comment on whatever you’re wearing. Go for the polished version of your childhood self: real pants, a good sweater, and maybe something that provokes a judgy, “Oh. Is that what they wear in New York now?” Say nothing. Shoot a withering glare at their Stanley Cup.
The Country Club Thanksgiving: Dress like you respect the clubhouse rules but could overthrow them if you felt like it. Think immaculate knit, tailored pants (denim if you like to stir shit up), and shoes that don’t make noise. Have three gins and then bring up the Epstein files. Disappear into the bathroom and then Uber uptown to drink and complain loudly about your Dad.
The Cousin Walk: The excuse is “fresh air,” but everyone knows better. You need layers that look innocent but read cool to your co-conspirators. The vibe is very “Yes, I brought the lighter this year.”
The Hometown Bar (Where Your High School Ex Will Definitely Be): This is polished enough to haunt them, relaxed enough to pretend you didn’t plan it. Think perfect jeans, a subtly hot top, and a bag that says “I left town and got richer.” It’s an outfit to match your unbothered act, even if your heart says otherwise.
Downtown NYC Thanksgiving: Nothing says Soho turkey like a $23 pumpkin spice espresso martini at The Corner Store. Aim for slouchy layers and great denim that says “I live here, I’m not visiting.” A leather jacket nails that downtown insouciance: unfussy and impeccably cool… but definitely still gonna post this on your story.
The Tryptophan Nap: Dress like you’re fully participating in the day yet perfectly positioned to disappear into a post-pie blackout. Think loose layers and stretchy waists that promise, “I will absolutely fall asleep sitting up.” If you’d like to be a menace, snore loudly during the football game.
I love the outfit ideas, but the captions are my favorite. 😂
Came for the outfits, stayed for the discourse.